


I'm Sorry What's...?

by SunshineOMeara



Series: Alternate Universe's of Hope [1]
Category: Original Work
Genre: Alternate Universe - Kimi no Na wa. | Your Name. Fusion, F/M, I wrote this instead of book 2 of my main series, Inspired by Kimi no Na wa. | Your Name., Other characters show up but those are the ones we are concentrating on the most
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-20
Updated: 2020-08-28
Packaged: 2021-03-06 18:48:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,670
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26003686
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SunshineOMeara/pseuds/SunshineOMeara
Summary: Sometimes life gives people a chance. This might be a chance encounter or a lucky break. And for some? Well, they can change fate.Claudia was just trying to get through high school so she could finally convince her parents to move back to Europe. At this point, she didn’t care where in Europe, she just wanted out of New York. Her true hope was to find a quiet place to live.Frederick was just trying to stay under the radar. His family had been promised that they were safe, but he considered staying in the shadows even safer. At this point, he just wanted to retire to the countryside and raise sheep.Destiny had other plans.
Relationships: Claudia Athanasiou/Frederick Vongsouthi
Series: Alternate Universe's of Hope [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1887394





	1. Slow down give me time to catch up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Do you ever wake up and realize something was off about you the day before but you have no clue what because you don't remember living it?

_ Remind me of who you are _

~

Sometimes I wake up crying, longing for something I can’t remember. Like I dreamed a lifetime only to forget when I woke. I can’t help but search for something, reach for someone those mornings. I always feel like there is something missing. Like I lost a limb in my sleep. Lost my reason for being. Whatever it is, those mornings the feeling of loss and longing drives me to search for something. Someone.

Something inside of me is crying out for something I don’t remember losing and it’s tearing me apart. It makes me want to run from everything I know. Or maybe run _to_ something I don’t remember.

Some of those days I just want to scream “find me” for no reason.

~

**Pardon, but do you have the time?**

~

I just want things to take a second and

_Slow down._

~

An alarm goes off, a hand reaches out and turns it off.

“Thank fuck,” Sebastian murmured into his pillow. Frederick couldn’t help but agree with his brother. He felt exhausted to his core and wanted another hour of sleep.

They were granted five minutes of peace before their sister started knocking. “Up and at ‘em ye filthy heathens! It’s time to embrace the bright bloody fuckin’ sky!”

“Every fucking morning,” Frederick murmured into his pillow.

“Fuck off, Amelia!” Sebastian yelled. Her normal retort was copiously missing as the door inched open and their sister entered.

“A minute!” Frederick yelled before pushing himself up.

“Oh, your feeling better this morning,” Sebastian said, relieved. All his irritation at their sister seemingly gone as he turned toward Frederick.

“You were a bit out of it yesterday. I know you said headache, but even meds didn’t help,” Amelia pipped up, her voice soft and her face slightly scrunched up in guilt. “I meant to not yell this morning. I forgot. Sorry.”

Frederick just looked at his siblings in confusion before seeming to decide they were playing a prank and turned his attention back to his phone. He squinted at the date before shaking his head. “Hey, Ams, you sticking around, or can I get dressed in peace?”

She took a second to watch him before putting her hands up in surrender and left the room, closing the door behind her.

“Are we just supposed to ignore yesterday…?” Sebastian trailed off, watching Frederick carefully.

“Yup,” he responded, moving to get ready for the day. He, personally, felt it was too early to deal with cryptic siblings.

“Right, well, Anastasia won’t give it up.”

Frederick closed his eyes at those words before bracing himself for the day. It was going to be a long day if Anastasia was in on this.

~

He was apprehensive about what he would find so he slowly inched his way to the kitchen. He was surprised to see the whole family there. His youngest siblings and mom weren’t a surprise, but Amelia typically finished breakfast before she woke him up, and both Anastasia and their dad were typically done before he made it downstairs. Dread turned his stomach to lead. Taking a deep breath he walked in and gained the undivided attention of his whole family.

“Are you feeling better today?” Mum asked.

He blinked at her for a moment before shaking his head. “Yeah. Not sure what yesterday was about.” He went and started making himself a bowl of cereal, shoulders slightly tense. He could feel his family’s stares and was still confused about what it was he did to warrant this.

“Well, you _do_ get quiet and introspective when you are in a lot of pain,” Amelia offered before taking another bite of toast.

Frederick took a second to thank his lucky stars that she put off eating for whatever reason. Maybe it would stop their older sister from saying anything.

“But he doesn’t forget everything,” Anastasia said, dashing his hopes. He could feel her eyes boring into him. Grey as steel and just as unwelcome during his breakfast. He rested himself against the kitchen counter and just started shoveling cereal into his mouth, not wanting to get closer to the table and his family.

“Leave him alone,” Dad said, taking both his and Anastasia’s plates to the kitchen sink.

“But dad! It’s weird!”

“Everyone has their off days,” he said, sternly to his oldest, before looking at his second-born, eyes softening. “But if it happens again, I’m taking you to the hospital for a check-up. You were more out of it than I’ve ever seen you. Any of you.”

Frederick softened at his dad’s words, posture relaxing. It had to have been bad if his dad was saying _that_. “I’m not objecting. Just not sure what you all mean.”

“Amnesia,” Jeanne declared, to the groaning of all her siblings.

“For one fu- day!” Sebastian said, throwing his arms into the air, trying to distract his mom’s disapproving glare from his almost swear.

Jeanne shrugged. “Got a better idea?”

“We’re late for school?” Frederick offered, downing the rest of his cereal as his siblings cursed and ran to grab the rest of their items.

“I’m glad your feeling better,” Mum offered as he went to follow them.

“Me too.”

~

“I still think it’s weird that you forget everything,” Anastasia said, dashing his hopes of a quiet walk to school. “You have all your notes separated by class, and yet you didn’t know which folder to grab and didn’t seem prepared to hand in anything.”

“Maybe he was abducted by aliens and replaced with a changeling,” Amelia offered.

Jeanne groaned and started walking faster.

“You can’t combine sci-fi and fantasy like that, Amy!” Sebastian interjected, already livid at her.

“That’s a new record,” Frederick grumbled as they started ‘debating’ whether it was truly combining genres or if Amelia was just ‘letting the aliens be spicier than just boring probing.’

“I hate to say it, and you did _not_ hear me say this, or I will cut you, but she might be right,” Anastasia whispered to him.

Frederick sighed. “Right or not, I still have no clue what you are talking about. Think we can drop this for now?”

She side-eyed him. “For now.”

Then with an unspoken agreement, they caught up with Jeanne and left Amelia and Sebastian to their bickering.

~

It wasn’t until he grabbed his first class’s folder did he finally realize that his siblings might be on to something. His notes were more detailed than normal, and most importantly, not in his handwriting. The writing was loopier and messier than his. Rushed in places and then like the writer purposely attempted to slow themselves down. He was so fascinated with the writing he didn’t realize he was being called until Amelia poked his side, hissing ‘here.’

“Here,” he repeated, louder, with a resolve to figure out what was going on after class.

~

Lunch didn’t solve anything. He had notes for each class, all about what had been done that day, with the same handwriting that he couldn’t get out of his head. It reminded him of a painting or the ocean.

He had to claim he was making sure he knew his notes to explain his fascination with his notebooks to his siblings. But really it was the furthest thing from his mind. The only thing he could concentrate on was **_Who are you?_** It had been hidden at the end of each of his notes for each class.

A request for information hidden after the recording of every single one of his classes almost as if the writer only remembered to be confused about his identity after the class was over.

It consumed his waking mind to the point where he barely remembered the day and barely kept his siblings off his tail. To the point where he didn’t notice a single concerned stare thrown his way or the hushed whispers or frantic texts about his state of being.

~

He didn’t find any answers before he went to bed. All he had was more questions and his sibling’s careful stares.

~

_give me time to catch up_

_~_

Claudia practically whined as her alarmed went off. It was going to be a bad day, she just knew it.

Forcing herself to get up, she turned her alarm off and sat down at her vanity. Only then did she realize how strange it was that her phone was on her nightstand and not her vanity.

And how odd it was that the charger had been moved. In fact, now that she was up, she noticed that her dream journal was also near her bed. Alarm bells were ringing in her head.

“Hmm.” She bit her lip, looking between her phone, charger, journal, and where it was all supposed to be. Pursing her lips, she took a deep breath and went through her typical morning routine. Flexing her hands, she notices a smudge of black. Looking closer she realizes it says **Frederick** in neat handwriting in one of the sections where she didn’t have scarring on her right hand.

Taking a second to process, she poked it before saying, “Oh.” Another moment of blinking before she got up and went to her bed. She opened it up until the last bit of writing in it, where she noted the same neat handwriting, even if it was shakier than her brain was telling her it was supposed to be.

She flipped until she found where she had written her last strange dream down, and the handwriting had corrected and added to what she had written the day before.

 ** _No._** She checked her phone. **_Two days before._** She had written what she could remember about a young man who had a loud life. She thought it was an omen or a forgotten memory.

It had felt a bit like a memory or something she had forgotten.

Apparently, the memory was Frederick and his six family members. Who was very confused as to who she was, what she was, where he was, how he was in her body, why she was in so much pain and covered in scars, and how he knew all that she had written down. Really though, he was more concerned with the state of her body than he was the rest of it.

She couldn’t blame him at that, but considering she was in the same outfit she put on Friday night, she wasn’t sure if he realized how bad her scarring really was.

“What the hell?” Her wide eyes unable to leave the pages. “It was real.”

She barely remembered to go to breakfast, she was too busy reading the words in front of her.

~

She went downstairs after a much needed shower and change of clothes to find two concerned parents. Claudia took a second to steel herself and keep from running away at their concern before fully entering the dining room.

“How’s this morning looking?” Baba softly asked. Mom moved a glass of water closer to Claudia’s seat at the table.

“Better than yesterday, baba,” Claudia promised.

“Let us know if it gets worse, baby,” Mom asked.

Claudia rolled her eyes. “I promised that months, practically years ago, mom.”

“Yes, and yet yesterday you seemed to have forgotten that promise. I don’t know if I have ever seen you in so much pain.”

“Juliann, she can’t help it when her nerves rebel,” Baba reminded his wife, who scrunched up her face up in consideration.

“I’m feeling better today,” Claudia said firmly. She moved quickly to finish her food, not really in the mood to spend her Saturday convincing her parents she was fine.

“Alright, but you let us know the second you need something.”

“Mom, seriously, I will. I know it’s your job to worry, but I will.”

Mom opened her arms and Claudia moved to cuddle into them. “My baby is in pain. I’m allowed to be worried.”

“I know, mama, I know,” Claudia whispered into her shoulder, basking in her mom’s warmth and the comforting feeling of her baba’s arms embracing the both of them.

~

The first thing she did when she went back up stairs was write down every single thing she thought he would need to know to be her, on the off chance that they switched again.

The rest of the day was spent planning what to do if this happened more often than just this once.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I said I was going to post it this weekend. I got impatient.


	2. I feel so lost looking at you walk away from me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Once is happenstance. Twice is coincidence.

_I feel so lost_

~

**_Frederick,_ **

**_Pretending to be another person is hard. To help you, here is a collection of information starting with important people (with name pronunciations because I don’t know how familiar you are with non-English names/pronunciations. Anything without a translation is what most of the Americans I know would pronounce it as)._ **

**_Me! Claudia Belinay Athanasiou (_ ** **_Ath_ ** **_-ah-_ ** **_nah_ ** **_-SEE-yew). Ignore my middle name I never introduce myself with it. Some people will call me Claudia Terezi or CT. They are close to me. Everybody else its Claudia. Sometimes it’s Athanasiou. I’m a New Year baby._ ** **_Wooo_ ** **_was born too early but it’s all good._ **

**_Mom is Julianna and baba is Şükrü (Sh-i-k-a-_ ** **_ru_ ** **_). Mom used to be a bartender and is now a social worker and baba likes to recreate paintings in his spare time but spends most of his time as a locksmith._ **

**_I have 3 friends/cousins/brothers that you may never meet but need to know about just in case. First off is Marco (Mar-co), he is eight years older than me at 25. He is like a big brother to me and the other two. We are both only children. His mom, Abigail (Ah-_ ** **_unt_ ** **_Abi) is an ex-child assassin. His sperm donor is not worth talking about. The ex-child assassin is important only if you ever meet her._ **

**_Then you have Jean (Similar to your sister_** ’ ** _s name but John instead of Jan)/Giovanni (Joe-van-e), whose 22. He is currently working and doing some volunteer work. He hasn’t figured out what exactly he wants to do but enjoys being a server so he isn_** ’ ** _t worried. His little brother’s name is Florian. His dad is Lars (Uncle La-z) and mom is Elizabeth (Ant Elizabeth [sometimes ‘Lizabeth but she prefers ‘_** ** _zabeth_** ** _or rather really her full name). His (ah-_** ** _unt_** ** _) Helena (Heh-lan-a) is not related to him but we suspect is biologically related to their shared sister Mai (named after the German word for May pronounced ah-unt Mia). Nicolo (Uncle/Zio [Z-o] Nic/Nicky/’Lo depending, its safe to just say Nicky or Zio or both. Consistency is not my strong suit) is dating Mai but here because of Elizabeth._**

**_Finally, Matthias (Ma-tea-us otherwise known as Mattie [sometimes Mattea]) is 18. His life goal is to be a stay at home dad but is working on becoming a lawyer thanks to a wonderful family friend who we all love. It was that or a social worker and he can argue with more people as a lawyer. His brother, Giang (Zan), is 10, and his sister, Sofia Yen (So-f-_ ** **_ea_ ** **_E-_ ** **_ng_ ** **_), is 6. His dad is Damian (I say Uncle Day-me-on but I have been known to pronounce it Dam-ion - either works) and mom is Nguyệt (_ ** **_Ngway_ ** **_)._ **

**_To be honest, with the boys I wish you luck. They will either deem bad day or figure out you aren’t me right away and I cannot help you there._ **

**_Other people to know, Coach Tallulah Higgins-Zaoui, or HZ, but mostly Coach. I used to be on the cheer team, but due to health issues and nerve damage, I am now just Coach’s assistant. Just call her ‘Coach’ and do your best. Claim headache if you have no idea what’s going on. I’m going to let her know that the nerves are acting up and use that as an excuse. We are basically done with practices but I do still have some responsibilities._ **

**_Elenor Broussard is a piece of work. Just call her Elenor. I worked hard for my place on the team and she resented it and now lords over me that she got my old position. Also, is more popular than me now that I quit the team. Be polite and correct her on my true role when she calls me the team cheerleader. But always be polite. Trust me on that. Be polite to everyone_ ** **_tbh_ ** **_. Sometimes people show up with her. Ignore them, unless they talk directly to you then either be polite or ignore what they say. I’ll let you decide._ **

**_Jake Blaese is the resident fuck boi and really wants a second date. Don’t give it to him. Please. I canNOT stand him at all. I don’t even need to include a picture. You’ll know._ **

**_Kayleigh Richards and Hasan Rice are the only ones in this fucking school I can stand sometimes. Kayleigh can get annoying, especially with her not so subtle crush on Jake. Hasan is quiet and in love with Ion McKee, who does not go to Lorde High but goes to Stratsoville, a private high school._ **

**_Oh and my social studies teacher? Maxwell Benton? Asshole. Just try to survive that class and please don’t speak up. He’s ableist and racist and homophobic. They refuse to get rid of him and we are working on getting me out of that fucking class._ **

**_Finally, I am proudly pansexual. When I came out, people had a lot to say about that and not all of it was nice. So, whenever anybody asked me out, I agree. I make it known they get only get 1 date unless they pass my test, no kiss/sex, or really anything. It will basically be friends hanging out. Typically dinner only. There have been a couple people who have convinced me otherwise, but mostly it_** ’ ** _s just dinner. If you go on a date, I’ll have a list of questions I want you to ask and to record their answers. If you can record record like on my phone, then that’s perfect! Do that! Otherwise, do your best. I’ve never said no, but I have walked out on dates. If they try advances, or putting something in my drink, or suggest I am a slut, or ask me into a_** ** _thrupple_** ** _/orgy, or attempt to force a kiss on me, or flat out molest me, either slap them or just walk out without saying a word. If they ask, tell them why they lost their chance, but be polite and as political about it as you can._**

**_Also, if going to school is too much, you can skip. Just ask mom to call it in. I’m stupid so I try and function through the pain, but I totally understand if you can’t. I know how much it hurts. I swear some days are not living death._ **

**_I feel like I forgot something, but I left a map and school schedule for you already. I’m planning on leaving my outfits out. You might need to shower some days, and while I will attempt to make it so you don’t have to, I understand if you do. I just request you are respectful the entire time you are in my body. I promise I am in yours._ **

**_I swear but try not to do it often at school. I am popular and do answer in class, but you don’t have to. While I do talk a bit, you can also be quiet as much as necessary. I am quite more often than people would have expected before the incident. Just be polite but not a doormat and you should be golden._ **

**_Gosh, this is rather long sorry! I tried to make it as helpful as possible! Oh, my phone password is set now to your name._ **

**_~ Claudia_ **

_~_

_looking at you walk away_

Waking up as Frederick again brought Claudia a sense of thrill. He was real. Or rather it happened again. **_Still exciting._** She moved quicker to turn the alarm off before Sebastian complained more than he already had.

Attempting the phone again she realized he changed his password to a thumbprint. Mentally thanking him, she went to see if he left her any notes on his phone as Amelia yelled her assumed-to-be usual wake up call.

“Fuck off,” Sebastian yelled.

Claudia smiled at the interaction as she looked at his phone, coming up empty in the app department, but not letting it stop her. After all, she was a bit odd and jumping to the idea of freaky supernatural bullshit being real was a hard pill to swallow. It makes more sense she was prepared for it than he was. She was just glad he had added anything to her barely remembered notes of her day as him and changed his phone’s passcode.

“Another headache?” Sebastian’s concerned question got her to look up at him and quickly schooled her expression to something more natural.

“No, just lost in thought.”

His eyes narrowed. “You sure?”

“Yes. I’d say something if it wasn’t,” she said, concerned it was a little more earnest than it should be and quickly got up to find clothes.

“Dad threatened a check-up if you weren’t so excuse me if I don’t believe you.”

She stopped looking for a shirt to turn to him head-on. “Sebastian. I’m fine. I promise I’ll say something if I am not.”

After a few minutes of staring the other down, he sighed and got out of bed to grab his clothes to get ready for the day.

She took a deep breath and went to get ready for the day while sending a mental apology for the breach of privacy to Frederick.

~

She tried really hard to not skip into the kitchen, but she couldn’t help it. She felt like she was on cloud nine. She wasn’t in pain and the house was full of hustle and bustle. Claudia loved her parents, but she always had wished for a sibling. Frederick had four and it was everything to her.

The only problem was she had no idea what was on the day’s agenda. **_Oh, well._**

“Mum, what’s the plan for the day?” Jeanne was asking when Claudia entered the kitchen, unintentionally saving her life. Claudia sent her a mental thank you as she moved to grab some cereal.

Their mum set her teacup down. “There isn’t one. Why?”

“I was thinking of getting some sketching done by the river today.”

She smiled at her daughter. “Just be back by dinner.”

“Okay.” Jeanne kissed her mum’s cheek and left.

Claudia watched all this while eating cereal. She was debating whether or not she could spend money on visiting things when Amelia came up to her.

“Oh, big brother,” she pouted at Claudia, who reflexively narrowed her eyes as this was a tactic she was very familiar with. She’s used it many times on many different people, but especially Marco.

“Yes, little sister?”

Amelia’s eyes sparkled and her pout turned into a poorly hidden smile. “I have a very simple request.”

Claudia raised an eyebrow.

Amelia sighed. “I still need to get dad something and it’s boring to go alone.”

Claudia rolled her eyes before finished her cereal and putting it in the sink. “Let’s go.”

“Wait really?” Amelia said, shocked. She hurried to catch up to Claudia who had already made it through the dining room to the front door.

“Yes, really,” was all Claudia said, but Amelia’s blinding smile made Claudia wonder if this was something Frederick would normally do.

~

“I wasn’t sure if you had something to do today,” Amelia said as soon as they had made it a little aways from the house.

“No plans,” Claudia lied and hoped it was true.

“Good. I like shopping with you the best. Granted if I want to get through the trip without arguing, my options are really just you or Jeanne, but still! My point stands.”

Claudia smiled and bumped shoulders with Amelia.

~

Amelia spent half the trip asking Claudia if she thought her dad would like a variety of presents from a knitted scarf to a gag gift to a box of chocolates to a toaster. They finally settled on a stuffed hot dog/dachshund toy Amelia found and claimed he would love.

Claudia had no ability to claim whether he would or not so it was bought. They got lunch with Jeanne an hour before they found the present. The rest of the day was spent hanging out around York.

It was one of the most fun days Claudia had had in a while.

~

_from me_

_~_

**_Frederick,_ **

**_Spent the day with Amelia! She got your dad this mini stuffed dachshund/hot dog that was honestly so cute! We had lunch with Jeanne and just spent the day going from store to store and then walking around town. I absolutely love your sister and city!_ **

**_Just_ ** **_outta_ ** **_curiosity though when’s your birthday? when’s your siblings? what’s the birth order? I am assuming you are all multiples but please, please correct me if I am wrong!_ **

**_Any friends? I hung out with your siblings only last time and only the two today. Hope you didn’t have plans. I love your siblings and hope you do too._ **

**_Please leave me a to do list! I have no clue what I’m supposed to be doing!!! My plan is to spend some time reading your notes and some of your books, but I got side tracked. I could mostly follow along with your classes but a to do list would be helpful._ **

**_What did Sebastian mean about your dad threatening a check up? What do I need to do more/less of to be you? I’ve been avoiding names in case you use nicknames. Am I doing that ok??? Also, how do you refer to your parents? Do you swear? Talking habits?_ **

**_I need help Frederick PLEASE! Help me be a convincing you!!! I sort of left a list of things like this at my place but let me know if you need to know more._ **

**_Is waking up in your own body as hazy for you as it is me?_ **

**_I’m fairly certain this is actually happening and not a lucid dream. At least 88%. I understand if you don’t. Just please believe this is real! I need some help._ **

**_It’s been fun! ~ Claudia (the one whose possessing your body and whose body you are possessing [sorry about that])_ **


	3. Slow down I can’t comprehend

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Once is happenstance. Twice is coincidence.

_ Slow down _

~

Frederick woke up and every part of his body ached. He knew right there and then he was back in Claudia’s body. He had no idea how she survived each day. The medication worked to a degree, but last time it had been a labor and a half to function, as in breath or eat. He had felt like his body was on fire, his very blood was liquid fire or corroding with acid, and that his head would explode.

He had no idea how she kept going most days.

Thankfully, this time was less painful, but it was still an intense wake-up. Slowly, he lifted his arms to turn off the still ringing phone. He strongly considered staying in bed and just staring at the ceiling again until her mom comes in to check on him, but a part of him resented that idea so with a great sigh he heaved himself off the bed and gingerly made his way over to the vanity.

A quick glance at the mirror told him that she had left a ‘ **_ pre-day routine that should help  _ ** ♡.’ The heart was what made him swear the pain just about when away with the warmth spreading from his chest and the smile on his face. After taking her medication, he reached for the dream journal he had found last time. It had some interesting clues the last whatever-this-was time.

Not much but enough to make him feel less like he was losing his mind. This time she had a note sticking out of the pages.

**_ I have fibromyalgia and no idea how to help you except by leaving a list of things that I do to make it more bearable. I’m sorry you have to go through this. I wouldn’t wish it on my worst enemy. The pain ebbs and flows, but will always be there. I pulled up some links for you to read on my phone about how to deal with the pain. Hopefully, these notes help make the day better. If not, I have a heated blanket in the closet, a swimsuit set on top everything in the first drawer of my dresser, and a packet of Epsom salts. If you are feeling up for school, I also included a class list and ways of interaction, schedule, locker number and code, and other little notes that should help you make it through the day on my phone. Fibro likes to make thoughts a little less…clear sometimes. If you need the chair, let mom know, otherwise there is no shame in staying home. Seriously, do whatever you need to do for you. I realize this is my body, but to be honest, life kicks my ass too. The actual note is in a journal app I put on the last page of my phone. Good luck! ~ Claudia. _ **

While his body felt more like the time he broke his arm but all over, his heart warmed seeing that familiar messy, loopy, handwriting he found himself staring at for too long most hours.

Taking a deep breath, he reached for her phone again. Thankfully, the date said it was Sunday, which he hoped meant he could take a second and read. It took him longer than he wanted to admit to finish reading the links on dealing with pain and just about groaned when he saw her extremely lengthy note on the people in her life.

Although he would admit that while the note was overwhelming, it was good information to have. Most of these people seemed important to her. And neither of them knew if this was permanent or would happen again, but she took the time to give him information on his life to function. It made him feel guilty that  _ he _ hadn’t done this. Hopefully, she would understand.

He was about to get up to get some food when he paused and looked into her eyes. “Thank you.” With that finished, he decided he had put it off long enough. With a mental apology to Claudia, he went and got dressed and ready for the day.

~

His favorite thing about being Claudia was the quiet. His house was always full of noise and siblings. Hers was loud only in the decorations. Each room had at least one famous painting in it. If it wasn’t for Claudia’s note, he would have assumed they were canvas prints. Knowing her dad made them? It made him stop and stare at them longer than he would have if they were in a museum.

Being her might be painful, but it was relaxing and kind of lonely. Her parents were nice but they all did their own thing. Sure he ate meals with them, but the day had passed with him exploring Claudia’s life and house instead of a round of video games with Sebastian or Amelia, puzzles with Anastasia or Jeanne, either activity with his parents, or a family game night.

It was only one night, but he still felt like it was odd to be allowed this time to exist and not have someone wanting to do something with him or another person. Odd, but kind of nice.

He enjoyed the calm that came with being her, he decided while they all sat and watched  _ The Princess Bride _ . Şükrü spent the movie sketching and Julianna drank tea while saying all of Buttercup and Inigo’s lines with them.

~

_ I can’t comprehend _

~

** Claudia, **

** Thank you so much for this. I have a feeling it will be a great help in days to come. I want to say that I don’t think you are stupid so much as strong-willed. To go to school like this is mind-boggling, and yet I am not surprised that you do. In a good way. **

** Your family sounds large and interesting. I am so curious as to what you mean by ‘The ex-child assassin is important only if you ever meet her. ** ’  ** How does that make sense? How is she even a person you met and learn this about her? I just have so many questions related to her. **

** I’m sorry that happened to you when you came out. I am astounded at your solution and I know for a fact that Amelia would love you simply for that fact alone. I think you are amazing and hope you don’t go out with any creeps (or that those situations you described actually happen to do because if so, Abi??). I will do my best to be as polite as possible, but I cannot promise I won’t react in anger at anyone who tries to mistreat you. For the record, I am biromantic and demisexual. I haven’t officially come out so much as I bring it up sometimes. **

** You have to be the strongest person I know. **

** Hasan seems like the only person in your school you actually like. I have no idea how the first thing you think of is an enemy instead of a friend when telling someone about the people in your life. I am actually slightly scared to attend your school now. I am happy to report that I do not have enemies so you shouldn’t have nor have any problems. **

** With your notes, I should be able to make it to class and not miss too much. I cannot promise I will not miss at least once or twice though. **

** I swear to you on the lives of my family I will be as respectful as I possibly can the entire time I am in your body. I hope that is one thing you will never have to worry about. **

** Frederick **


End file.
